How confession works now

01The basics

What confession is

Zacchaeus hurries down and welcomes Him “joyfully.”⁷ In front of everyone, he promises half his money to the poor and to pay back anyone he cheated, four times over.⁸ Jesus says: “Today, salvation has come to this house.”⁹

Confession is where you tell your sins to a priest and walk out with God’s pardon and peace.¹ Only God forgives sins, and Jesus handed that power to men to use in His name.¹⁰

“When he had said this, he breathed on them, and said to them, ‘Receive the Holy Spirit! If you forgive anyone’s sins, they have been forgiven them. If you retain anyone’s sins, they have been retained.’”

So what actually happens when you walk in? Fewer steps than you’d think.

02The walk-through

What happens, one step at a time

If it’s been years, or you’ve never been, you don’t need to memorize any of this. Just say, “It has been a long time. Can you help me?” The priest will walk you through it. They love that sentence.

1. Greeting: the priest greets and blesses you.¹⁴

2. A reading: sometimes a short Bible passage, to help you look at your life honestly.¹⁴

3. Your confession: you tell the priest your sins in plain words, no poetry needed.¹⁴

4. A penance: the priest gives you something small to do, often a prayer, an offering, or an act of kindness.^14,15

5. Absolution: the priest says the words of forgiveness, ending, “I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.”¹⁶

6. Go in peace: a prayer of thanks, and you’re sent off with a blessing, lighter than you walked in.¹⁴

But what if you’re not sure you’re sorry enough? Or you can’t remember everything?

03The heart of it

Sorrow, not perfection

What you need is contrition: real sorrow for the sin, plus the decision not to do it again. Not perfect feelings; an honest yes.¹⁸

You bring the serious sins you know about after an honest look at your life. Confess what you can remember, and you’ve put all of it in front of God’s mercy.¹⁹

Why say them out loud? The Catechism’s answer is perfect: “if the sick person is too ashamed to show his wound to the doctor, the medicine cannot heal what it does not know.”¹⁹

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

And the fear under all of it: what will the priest think? Will he tell anyone?

04The promise

The seal, and the priest

Every priest who hears confessions is bound, under very severe penalties, to keep absolute secrecy about what you say. No exceptions, ever; it’s called the seal.²

Priests are asked to show “respect and sensitivity toward the one who has fallen.” He’s not the owner of God’s forgiveness, just its servant.²²

In that little room, the priest is playing the part of the father watching the road for his prodigal son.²³

“‘He arose and came to his father. But while he was still far off, his father saw him and was moved with compassion, and ran, fell on his neck, and kissed him.”

Zacchaeus climbed a tree just to catch a glimpse. Jesus was the One who stopped.